P: I will admit to some body nazism in terms of my own aesthetic - more than I would like to have. l look forward to the day when I see some guy with hips and go, "Grrr!"

C: Fat is an incredibly sexy thing on some people. For me, there's nothing better than a big, manly old lesbian. I talk about it in my new show that I want a woman who looks like John Goodman. This makes me think I must be really straight because I don't like women who are femmey at all, I like women that are dykey! I want a dagger!

P: That doesn't mean you're straight. They still have a vagina.

C: But those women have dicks!

P: What do you think about women with facial hair?

C: Love it! It's so hot.

P: I love you. Margaret Cho.

C: My favorite is an F-to-M. That's what I want to marry. An F-to-M chubby James Dean.

Although Paige and Cho are about as candid a duo as you're likely to come by in Hollywood, both struggled with how to present their sexuality to the world. "For a long time early in my career, no one cared," says Paige. "And then I couldn't conceive going back into the closet because I got Queer as Folk. That would just be retarded. But there are always people who say, 'You may want to keep it on the QT so you can work.'"

Cho recalls that several years ago when she was performing at a comedy festival in Montreal, her then-manager took her aside and told her "not to sit in Lea DeLaria's lap so much." He then asked her if she was "completely straight." I told him I didn't know, and he said - "It doesn't matter if you are or if you're not. You have to tell people that you are completely straight. You have to show that you are completely straight. "I didn't know how to do that. I didn't know how to be someone who wasn't me."